MONTALBANO STRANDED ON HITS FANTASY ISLAND

All good things must come to an end…so why should Liz Montalbano's career be any different?

Indeed, Priority's former Vice President of Crossover Promotion has crossed over…to the dark side as the new Crossover Editor of HITS (your #1 Source for Crossing Over, and in the case of our Editor In Chief, Cross-Dressing).

The announcement was made by new HITS Presidents Karen Glauber and Todd Hensley, 16 HITS Vice Presidents, 14 potential HITS Vice Presidents and the poor sucker we hired to follow Vice President/HITS Mix Show Editor Ricky Leigh Mensh into the men's room.

"It's the fine Corinthian leather," said Montalbano, who also cited Editor In Chief Lenny Beer's "little midget" as reasons for shipwrecking herself on HITS' Fantasy Island on acid.

Montalbano is an industry veteran with longstanding relationships at both the label and radio levels. Her knowledge of the business and her ability to comprehend, analyze and positively impact the marketplace are respected throughout the industry. That said, if she doesn't generate revenue in her first two weeks at the magazine, she'll be unemployed faster than Hensley can say, "Da plane, boss, da plane."

"Who the hell is Liz Montalbano, and how much am I paying her?" queried Beer.

HITS Publisher Dennis Lavinthal was on vacation and unavailable for comment.

HITS President Glauber noted that she was too important to be quoted in this story and declined to comment.

As always, HITS President Hensley's nose was too far up Beer's ass for his comment to be heard.