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Friday, February 16, 2018

LEADING THE LEAGUE IN POINTS

During the All-Star tipoff event on the Capitol lot, Quality Control/Motown/Capitol's Migos (whose "Stir Fry" is practically the NBA theme song) receive a plaque commemorating their unreal streaming numbers. The trio got to 1 billion streams faster than any group ever with Culture II, causing Steve Barnett to become so giddy he could barely execute his turnaround jump shot. Still: Nothin' but net. Seen wondering what kind of D would keep us away are (l-r) QC's Coach K, Migos' Quavo, QC's Pee, the group's Offset and Takeoff, Motown prez Ethiopia Habtemariam and Barnett.

 
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HITS LIST BLASTS OFF
Space is the place for Tay. (4/26a)
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SONG STREAMS: SWIFT SETS STREAMING RECORD
What did you expect? (4/26a)
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SPRING BREAKOUTS: THESE HEATERS ARE STILL HOT
Who's Boomin who. (4/26a)
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SONG REVENUE: “SWEET” SMELLS OF SUCCESS
Life after "Church" (4/26a)
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STAGECOACH: SETS TO SEE AND PLACES TO BE
Saddle up, cowboys and cowgirls. (4/26a)
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THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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