SOMEONE THEY LOVE

Backstage at his NYC show, U.K. phenom Lewis Capaldi receives a plaque from Capitol Music Group chief Steve Barnett and EMI/Virgin overlord Ted Cockle. The artifact commemorates 1m adjusted global album sales and 1b combined streams of his Divinely Inspired to a Hellish Extent. "Hoots, ah'm happier'n' a wee fookin' bairn," exclaimed the Scottish troubadour, to which the two label heads replied, "Er, quite."

HITS LIST BLASTS OFF
Space is the place for Tay. (4/26a)
SONG STREAMS: SWIFT SETS STREAMING RECORD
What did you expect? (4/26a)
SPRING BREAKOUTS: THESE HEATERS ARE STILL HOT
Who's Boomin who. (4/26a)
SONG REVENUE: “SWEET” SMELLS OF SUCCESS
Life after "Church" (4/26a)
STAGECOACH: SETS TO SEE AND PLACES TO BE
Saddle up, cowboys and cowgirls. (4/26a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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